Today’s type of adventure is permeated with both courage and fear for me…..

a large social gathering.

ADVENTURE ART CLUB | DAY 9 | 9.9

ARTS MISSOULA SOCIAL

AT FREE CYCLES

MISSOULA, MT

I grew up very isolated, and, as a result, I still feel like an alien at most gatherings of people, even though I’ve spent years challenging myself to engage in these spaces. I often set out for these evenings with a pit in my stomach for no obvious reason and thoughts that scream to me: “You know you don’t have to go……right?” and “You could just cancel and stay here.” I fight through my own physiology to attend, engage, and lean into surprises.

Though my default is to look for the worst case, I’m trying to teach myself to believe in the best. This evening could be a wonderful time! I could make new connections. Either way, this will be an experience to learn from.

Life lives on the other side of fear.

Tonight, Arts Missoula, a wonderful local organization whose purpose is to advocate and create opportunities for Artists of all kinds in Missoula, is hosting a social gathering for creatives in the community. I’ve chosen to attend as today’s adventure.

These wonderful people have their work cut out for them trying to foster a collective culture of gathering among Artists, many of whom find it difficult to engage in group settings, and I want to support them. I often crave community, gathering, sharing with others, but I don’t always know how to make that happen.

Why are so many Creatives like this? Part of me believes that many of us are so isolated because this setting ourselves apart from the group is necessary for us to examine what is. The Artist must stand alone to observe the crowd. We are deep feeling, introspective, deep thinking, and we need solitude to process and make things.

But….

What if this idea of “The Artist as Hermit” is a myth we’ve simply accepted?

Yes, we mostly create on our own, in solitude (for the most part). Yet, throughout history, some of the best pieces of art, even entire art movements, have resulted from informal gatherings of Artists making connections with one another, collaborating, participating, and simply supporting each other’s endeavors. The idea of the Artist as a penniless Hermit is completely unfounded, and yet we use this image to justify our (as a group)’s antisocial tendencies.

I, too, have had difficulty gathering Artists, stretching all the way back to my undergraduate studies, where I co-chaired the Painting & Drawing Guild with my friend - a talented Artist in her own right - Samantha Hinckley. We’re still friends to this day.

We practically had to pull teeth for Artists we knew to engage in completely free opportunities purpose-built for them. We struggled to communicate the immense, immeasurable value of connecting with others. This process of connection can enliven, comfort, and inspire, if only we'd let it.

Tonight, I arrive at Free Cycles for Arts Missoula’s gathering with a flutter of fear in my heart, as always. Despite this response, I keep walking, crossing the threshold.

Free Cycles is another amazing local organization, founded in the 90s, that offers affordable bicycles, classes, tools, and instruction to encourage more people to bike for transportation and to advocate for safe biking spaces in our community. The building itself is an Artist’s playground - rich with textures, odd shapes, light, shadow, and creative solutions. Free Cycles offers its space up for community gatherings.

Fiona, Membership Coordinator for Arts Missoula, cheerfully greets me at the entrance as I make my way inside, looking over the refreshments and pausing to participate in a “draw something” activity laid out for us. I’m going to ease into this evening, I think. Looking around, I barely know anyone here, and the ones I do are already engaged in lively conversation with some one or two people in what appears to me to be very closed groups. I feel like a “one” in a sea of circles.

I have never known how to approach people in conversation at events. I always feel like I’m interrupting and painfully awkward. Do I just….sidle up next to a stranger and stand there….silently? Do I laugh my way in, not knowing what was so funny? I envy anyone who can navigate group gatherings of strangers with ease. I’m uncomfortable.

Tonight, I don’t push myself. (Sometimes I do). Instead, I drift along alone observing the space and taking it all in. I walk outside to the silence and nature, listening, breathing, then drift back inside to engage again.

Finally, I’m approached by another “one” in this setting, Amber, who happens to pass by me, and we start talking. Amber runs “Giving Arts to Missoula”, another amazing non-profit I’m familiar with. She takes in donations from the community and offers art and craft supplies to the public at deep discounts (like a thrift store, for Artists!). They host workshops and education opportunities and so much more. I enjoy reconnecting with her.

After a while, our hosts pause to address the group and talk about Arts Missoula’s lofty goal: to create a collective voice for “the arts” in this valley and to keep Missoula vibrant and creative. I’m in! Eventually, the evening winds down, and I leave, happy I went (I usually am), though sadly, in this instance, not having widened my circle of connections. Still, it's valuable to be present to represent one in that collective voice we spoke of earlier.

Adventure meets me in these social gatherings through the thrill of connection.

Anything could happen here, and it’s important to stay open. If we always stay where we’re comfortable, adventure can never meet us. It’s important to check in along the way, but it’s just as important to transcend the parts of self that seek to keep us small and sheltered.

Be bold. Go anyway!

You never know what undiscovered treasures await.

Love & Gratitude

- Christina

The Gathering

The One That Wasn’t

The Bridges